Humility or fear of judgement?

I was listening to a sermon by John Piper in regards to the churches responsibility in confronting our brothers/sisters or "so-called brothers" (1 Corinthians 5:11) who are unrepentantly in sin. A very strong message but I was struck by this: "Humility does not try to tell God how to be gracious. It listens and tries to obey with fear and trembling." How often do I not go to a brother or sister in sin because I think "who am I to cast judgment on their actions." Although we all suffer with sin issues, we are commanded to go to one another and point each other towards Christ. Humility towards Christ should thrust us forward with fear and trembling to admonish and rebuke our brothers and exhort them in the teachings of Christ not falsely claim passive humility towards another because of our own fears and sin.

If we are in Christ, than we are being purified for his purposes. "Who [Jesus Christ] gave himself for us to redeem is from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works (Titus 2:14)." So those who are in Christ should look towards His purification in us. I am coming closer to the conclusion that Christ will use me in the life of others and others throughout the course of my life to sanctify me and purify me so that I might be used according to His purposes.

"If you reject Christ as a purifier, you do not have Him as a pardoner. You do not have Him as a divided Christ, He is One." (John Piper)

Convicted by a two year old... Part 2: Why you do that?

Since I have returned from my trip, Micah has been in a new phase. Perhaps we should call it the "question" phase. "What's that mommy? What that do mommy? Why you say that mommy? What you doing mommy?" and my favorite "Why you do that mommy?" Ordinarily those are great questions to ask. I am aware that Micah is starting to notice everything around him and so naturally there are questions that are beginning to form in his mind. He wants to know what everything is, how it works, why it works the way it does, and what purpose it holds. At first it was rather cute. I would try to come up with the best answer possible, really trying not to just brush him off and say, "because that's just how or what it is." However, after many days of nonstop questions I have grown weary. I have taken little time to answer his questions and in fact I have become irritated. Many times today I have had to apologize to Micah for my response and try a little harder to give an adequate (for a two year old) explanation. In the midst of one of my not so great responses the Holy Spirit again saw fit for a sanctification moment. The rebuke was so clear, "Do you not spend a lot of time trying to discern, understand, and question the ways of God. Perhaps you should have the grace and mercy and patience that God has towards your constant questioning towards Micah and his questions. But also just as you want Micah to rest in your answers, so you should to rest in Gods." In that moment I realized that Micah is not out to bother me, but rather it is his way of attempting to understand the circumstances around him. But just as it is important for him understand his circumstances, he needs to learn that sometimes mommy does what she does or says what she says because she is mommy and for the most part, she knows best. In the same, I need to learn that God does what He does and says what He says because He is God and He always knows best. Praise the Lord that I may put my trust in One who is infallible, unmovable, unchangeable and just. I am constantly reminding myself that everyday I need to exemplify Christ to Micah. So although I am fallible, I need to be to him unmovable, unchangeable, and as just as I can. Not to mention filled with grace and mercy and patience. So I must continually place my own desires aside to embrace Micah since he has been given to me to be loved, cared for, and brought up in the way he should go.

"Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and how inscrutable His ways! For who has know the mind of the Lord, or who has been His counselor? Or who has given a gift to Him that he might be repaid? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be glory forever. Amen."
Romans 11:33-36

Convicted by a two year old...

As we were driving home from our evening activities, I was instructing Micah to stop fussing because he wasn't getting his way. Each time I told him to stop, he would. Than a few seconds later he would follow it up with a sigh, grunt, moan, or just an out right "no" or "don't." It was absolutely infuriating. I was thinking "what boldness he has to think he should get the last word. Why can't he just accept what I say? Certainly he isn't challenging my authority. " And then, like a crashing wave, I was sharply rebuked by the Holy Spirit and immediately I recognized that I am just the same. Nothing like having the Holy Spirit point out your faults by saying, "Look, you are just like a two year old. Don't you always do the same?" I often feel like I have to have the last word so that my side is heard or my point is made or that I make known the discomfort that I am feeling instead of just letting it go. Some battles are meant to be fought, but I have to face it, most for me are just fought out of pride and self preservation, not love.

So, I take tonights little lesson, not the one taught to Micah, but the one taught to me and I look towards my future conversations with more open ears and speech that is filled with a little more grace, a little more mercy, and a lot more humility. Praise God for giving us the exact children we need to help along our sanctification process.

"Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness that God requires."
James 1:19-20